The Rude Singaporean

Singaporeans can’t seem to fail to disappoint me. Here is a little scenario that happened to me last night that brings out the unruliness of Singaporeans.

I had just finished watching “The Departed” at GV Marina and I was happily making my way to the taxi area. Being such a nice boy, me and Janet queued up and patiently waited for a Taxi. Suddenly, from the corner of my eye, we spotted an IDIOT COUPLE strolling past to two meters in front of us and hailed for a cab. Queuing Quadruple Friends in front of me started walking and they landed two meters in front of the idiot couple. So now we have queuing friends four meters away from us, IDIOT COUPLE two meters away from us. A taxi came and the queuing friends got on the taxi. A couple of minutes later, a taxi came.

Scenario 1

IDIOT COUPLE stopped the taxi and I slowly crept up to the couple. I said “No problem, we will wait for the next taxi. I am sure you must have something urgent. So get along and go do your stuff. Sweet dreams and good night.”
IDIOT COUPLE could be feeling extremely guilty or feeling extremely satisfied as they got their taxi earlier so that they could start humping earlier back at home and make aliens tonight.

Scenario 2

IDIOT COUPLE stopped the taxi and I amble up to the couple. I said “I believe I was here first so could you please follow the queue and patiently wait for the next taxi?”
IDIOT COUPLE could either go with “I am so sorry, please go ahead” or they could go with the “Go fuck yourself!” Suppose the earlier option, will lead to me reaching home first and the later, IDIOT COUPLE in the hospital.

Scenario 3

IDIOT COUPLE stopped the taxi and I yelled at the couple. I said “Hello!!! Excuse me!!!! I would think that I was here first.” I flick a cigarette across the face of the couple and I got onto the cab. Just before closing the door, I mumbled “Go fuck yourself. You mother fucker.”
IDIOT COUPLE would feel damn insulted and pretty offended by the attitude received by a fellow Singaporean but still choose to continue to hijack taxis from nice people queuing at the taxi stand, hoping that the next person in line would not screw him up for cutting the queue.

Scenario 4

IDIOT COUPLE stopped the taxi and I hurled at the couple. I said “KA-NI-NE, you @#$%^&*(!@#$%^&*(, you must have been from RI, as you were not taught to queue. Where are your freaking manners? I guess you must have kept it in your mother’s pussy.” I flick a cigarette onto the dress of the IDIOT LADY and it starts to burn. I spat onto the IDIOT GUY’S eyes in the attempt to blind him. Just before closing the door, I shouted “Go fuck an Indian, you Indian Cock-Sucker!!!”
IDIOT COUPLE in a state of shock and they are speechless and I am HAPPY!!!

For the word “unruly”, from dictionary.com it goes as so.
Adjective - not submissive or conforming to rule
Synonyms - disobedient, unmanageable, uncontrollable, stubborn, disorderly, riotous. Unruly, intractable, recalcitrant, refractory describes persons or things that resist management or control. Unruly suggests persistently disorderly behavior or character in persons or things: an unruly child, peevish and willful; wild, unruly hair. Intractable suggests in persons a determined resistance to all attempts to guide or direct them, in things a refusal to respond to attempts to shape, improve, or modify them: an intractable social rebel; a seemingly intractable problem in logistics. recalcitrant and refractory imply not only a lack of submissiveness but also an open, often violent, rebellion against authority or direction. Recalcitrant, the stronger of the two terms, suggests a stubborn and absolute noncompliance: a recalcitrant person, openly contemptuous of all authority. Refractory implies active, mulish disobedience, but leaves open the possibility of eventual compliance: refractory students, resisting efforts to interest them in their studies.

I have disappointed my friends my parents and my girlfriend. I believe that for every action there would be an equal and opposite reaction and that was why I was ignited and behave terribly. I am so sorry for behaving so unruly towards strangers. I am sorry that I have injected fear in your heart. I promise that I will try to change to be a better Singaporean and be nice to all sick-idiotic-withballssosmalltillfuckfourhoursstillcannotcum-incompetent-uncultured fools.