Life of a Prostitute

I am a prostitute. I sell my body for money. I am a university graduate but money had never been enough for me. Luxury items and extravagant goods had grown into part of my life. I need to have them. Selling my body was the easiest and fastest way to get cash. As part of my occupation, my degree has gone to waste as it was never required. My daily routine is just to make myself look good. I mean I need to look really good. I need to be sexy, elegant, attractive and also irresistible.

In my club, a requirement is that I would have to entertain guests and drink with them. Red wine, white wine, beer or hard liquor has already dampened my taste bud. Getting drunk is one simple way to minimize the guilt that I suffer from my life. Looking at men every day has grown to be so boring. I have seen men from different society. Celebrities, rich working business man to young paupers come and go. There are men who desire my body or rather a humping toy. Simply by getting on top of me basically satisfy all their mental and physical requirements. I never see these men again. There are other men finding a companion but I think that they talk too much and usually these are the clients whom have lesser spending power. They seem to have this mentality that wooing me over or touching my heart would be able to have me without spending money. They are so foolish. If I were out to meet a real man, I would have never chosen to walk this path in the first place. It would be pure wasting my time and wasting theirs.

All my pretence to be so nice and friendly is purely for one motive, which is to hope that my client could spend more cash on me.

I can’t remember when the last time I had a really good sex anymore. Knock me unconscious and then use me, it would be the same feeling I get when I am conscious. I am like a bar of soap. You will take me off the rack and rub yourself all over. When you are done you will just put it back. Have you ever put yourself in the shoes of a bar of soap and try to understand how an ordinary bar of soap feels. Time passes and the soap gets smaller and smaller, the soap just gets into the drainage and you will have another new bar of soap.

That is why I need to use my youth as my time. To be the most fragrant soap bar as compared to the rest on the rack. I want you to think of me by leaving my scent on your body. I want you to think of me and anxiously waiting to use me as your bar of soap.

I long for some one to know me and love me but I have contained my true self in this cheap and extremely seductive body. I use to be a simple girl living a simple life. It is the society and the peers that have driven me to this desperation.

I met this guy recently and his name is Lestat and he has completely no idea what occupation that I actually work as. In his eyes I am a normal regular tuition teacher who has a very strict mother that does not allow me to go out at night and also to chat on the phone at night. It is so lame in the eyes of others but yet he believes. I know between us it will never happen eventually unless I leave my job. Being twenty years old, he will never be able to comply with my personal demands and also he will never be able to accept my job and my life. He has been really sweet and nice to me but we just cannot be together.

I broke up with him a couple of days ago and it hurts. It hurts so bad that I broke down. I can’t seem to function at all. I am nineteen but yet it seems that I have seen it all. What this lifetime can show me, I have seen and walked through it. With this blade in my hand I hope I can end it. Please let me meet this boy again. I need to return his love in the same way he has showed me his. Please let me rest my eyes and hopefully when I reopened my eyes, the skies would have been cleared and me in a body where I can bravely show to the world, what I really am. Goodbye world as I now close my eyes.

Author
Johnny Kwek